I'm Not Koala-fied Vinyl Sticker

When the world’s on fire (literally), and your inbox is a crime scene, this I'm Not Koala-fied vinyl sticker from Soon To Be Mythical says what we’re all thinking—with claws and comic timing. Featuring a wide-eyed koala clinging to its last eucalyptus leaf of sanity, this kiss-cut vinyl sticker is water-, scratch-, and UV-resistant, with a vibrant satin finish that makes the existential dread pop. Available in 3" x 4" and 4" x 6" sizes.

Why It’s Tragically Perfect

• Gallows humor meets glossy finish: the I'm Not Koala-fied vinyl sticker is built for emotional durability

• Kiss-cut precision makes it easy to peel and stick wherever you need a dose of dark comedy

• Weatherproof and apocalypse-ready—just like you

• Pairs well with burnout, bushfires, and bureaucratic nonsense

Endangered Stats

Koalas are more than meme material—they’re in serious trouble:

• 🌿 Habitat Destruction: Over 80% of koala habitat has been lost or degraded

• 🔥 Climate Impact: Australia’s bushfires have killed thousands of koalas in recent years

• 🦠 Disease Threats: Chlamydia and koala retrovirus are rampant in wild populations

• 📉 Population Decline: Koalas are now listed as endangered in parts of Australia

• 💚 Conservation Support: A portion of every I'm Not Koala-fied vinyl sticker purchase goes to nonprofits working to protect endangered species and restore habitats

Perfect For

• Eco-anxious humans with a flair for satire

• Conservationists who laugh through the tears

• Animal lovers who know cute doesn’t mean safe

• Anyone who’s ever muttered “I’m not koala-fied” before facing the day

Stick it on your laptop, water bottle, or emotional support clipboard.

Disclaimer: The sheet size shown (e.g., 3" x 4" or 4" x 6") refers to the backing, not the actual sticker. The kiss-cut sticker will be slightly smaller.