I'm Not Koala-fied for This T-Shirt

When the world’s on fire and your inbox is a crime scene, this shirt says it all—without you having to. The I'm Not Koala-fied for This T-shirt from Soon To Be Mythical features a wide-eyed koala clinging to its last metaphorical branch of sanity, paired with punny despair. Made from 100% cotton (heathered colors are a cotton blend), it’s soft enough to cry into and durable enough to wear through the next climate summit.

Why It’s Tragically Perfect

• Gallows humor meets everyday comfort

• Bold design with “I'm Not Koala-fied for This” front and center—because subtlety is extinct

• Breathable cotton for those moments when you realize koalas aren’t the only ones losing habitat

• Pairs perfectly with burnout, bushfires, and bureaucratic nonsense

Endangered Stats

Koalas may look cuddly, but their reality is anything but:

• 🌿 Habitat Destruction: Over 80% of koala habitat has been lost or degraded

• 🔥 Climate Impact: Australia’s bushfires have killed thousands of koalas in recent years

• 🦠 Disease Threats: Chlamydia and koala retrovirus are rampant in wild populations

• 📉 Population Decline: Koalas are now listed as endangered in parts of Australia

• 💚 Conservation Support: A portion of every I'm Not Koala-fied for This T-shirt purchase goes to nonprofits working to protect endangered species and restore habitats

Perfect For

• Eco-anxious humans with a flair for satire

• Conservationists who laugh through the tears

• Animal lovers who know cute doesn’t mean safe

• Anyone who’s ever muttered “I’m not koala-fied” before facing the day